I've got some dirty and short rude jokes for you today…

Husband says; 'You know when I'm gone you'll never find another man link me.'
His wife replies; 'What makes you think I'd want another man like you!'

And now your going to read some short dirty jokes. These are really funny as sms jokes, so I advise you send this humor out to your friends…

Wife says to her husband, 'Give me some cash because I need to get a bra', Husband replies, 'what would you need to do that for… you haven't got anything to put in it!

And I couple more funny short jokes…

Heres a well known fact I learnt a long time ago now…
Man stands up to get knocked down, woman lays down to get knocked up.

Hilarious rude jokes!

'Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud.' 'Yes sir, it's fresh ground.'

And here's another good one…

1 I can see your point, but I still think you're full of sh*t.

2 I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

3 How about never? Is never good for you?

4 I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

5 I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.

6 I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

7 I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.

8 I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

9 It sounds like English, but I can't understand a damn word you're saying.

10 Ahhh…I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.

11 I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.

12 You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

13 I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.

14 I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

15 I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

16 Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.

17 The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

18 Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

19 What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?

20 I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

l love short rude jokes!